I almost pissed my pants...

I think last nights concert and adventures will go down in history as one of my favorite nights ever!!
I worked yesterday day...and then went straight to the Loop to meet up with Dawn, the bestest bestie ever! :)
Per our usual dining get togethers, and because Pi was SO busy, we went to The Noodle Cafe on Delmar, a little Chinese restaurant. I knew it was going to be a good night...and my fortune confirmed that thought...

(A fun party is soon to be in your future)
Well, we knew that, I was with Dawn already, getting ready to meet up with my concert going pals, Steve and Jeff. After eating we made our way across the street to one of my favorite concert venues....

Good times happen HERE.
Dawn at this point was still a skeptic. She had never heard Aaron Lewis until she listened to him on youtube the night before. She really didn't know what to expect, but was a little excited because of all MY excitement!

 Dawn and I pre-concert...she looks a bit worried.

Aaron Lewis fans become friends for life!
And the show must go on! Great performances by Aaron Lewis as he belted out many great lyrics and threw in a little humor to keep the crowd on their toes...(ie...Time After Time)

(there is a video of a song posted to my facebook, if I was ultra tech savvy I could probably insert it here, but I am not, so you must find it)
By the end of the show, Dawn was a believer and understood my excitement. Aaron Lewis, phenomenal musician. Words can not even describe the awe that surrounds him...

So, being the fun people that we are, we decided to go to the Pin-up...The Pin-up is where the excessive acts of randomness began...Such as meeting Pete. He started it.

This is Pete. Well, Dawn, Pete and Christy...he was the door guy, and I think he just carded us for personal gain rather than for his job.

See, the Pin-Up...that really is where we were....

Though you can't really see this, there was a really old car in the parking lot of the Moonrise...which became our next location for photo ops and lots of laughs!!
You see...there were these couches, and while they LOOKED really comfy, I am pretty sure they were only there as art, but as you can tell in the next picture, that was not realized until we decided to plop onto them in a drunken stupor...

The Moonrise also had a cute Halloween display, which I thought was another great opportunity for a photo.... It was at this point that we decided it would be best to call it a night... we parted ways with Steve and Jeff and decided to walk through the valet lot to my car rather than all the way down Delmar and around the buildings. THIS proved to be the BEST decision of the night!!!
As we walked around the corner, there was the tour bus, and who was outside of it, but Aaron Lewis himself!!

We were both lucky enough to have our tickets to the show autographed!

And Pictures taken!! (Aaron Lewis and Dawn!) She was excited because this is the first famous person she has ever met...

Aaron Lewis and I... me excited because I am in awe with this man!!
I think I almost pissed my pants!!
Many drunken texts and phone calls followed this moment...I can NOT believe I met him. It was totally random that we ran into him!
So, we headed to the car, and by the time we pulled out of the lot, the tour bus and Aaron Lewis had moved on to his next destination, so it was a stroke of luck that we walked back there at exactly the right time!

Nothing could have ruined that evening! One of the best nights I have ever had, thanks to Dawn, Steve, Jeff, and OF COURSE, Aaron Lewis....

xx

Dreamweaver...

I have been having a ton of vivid dreams lately. By a TON I really mean that they wake me up very early every morning. They are SO vivid that they seem real, and upon waking it takes me quite a while to decipher what is reality and what is just dreams; this causes me to toss and turn, wondering what has happened to cause this trauma.  I have awoke in tears many of these mornings because of the content of these dreams. The haunting continues, and while I have found a way to block these occurrences during waking hours (hopefully for good) I have not found a way to block these from my subconscious mind. He is still able to penetrate my thoughts when I am sleeping and unable to forcefully rid them from my thoughts.
One morning I will be waking to tears because my dreams are everything my reality longs for; the next it is because my dreams are everything my reality has become. I am hoping that more stress relief acupuncture sessions can free me from the emotional prison that I find myself trapped in.
I am willing his SOUL to part with mine, as our bodies have already parted. I know that he is not coming back, my body and mind know he is not coming back and our eyes will never meet again....it is time for the souls to part....

I am stuck on Band-aids....

Band-aids. Band-aids cover wounds. Band-aids do not heal wounds, but they may have the affect to take the pain away temporarily. Out of sight out of mind kind of mentality.
I am stuck on band-aids... I try to find all of the things I can to temporarily cover the wounds. I try to find band-aids big enough or significant enough to give me the out of sight of mind mentality. First, it was job hunting, that was a big band-aid. Then I found a job, so that band-aid was removed. When a band-aid is removed, the pain can sometimes be worse. Like you forgot that it was there until the band-aid was ripped off, fresh oxygen hitting the wound, and making you double over in pain, or elephant tears fill your eyes. My next band-aid was RC. More like gauze wrapping than a band-aid though. Wrapped tightly around the wound, but containing holes to let the oxygen though. Band-aid three: end of summer for Coby and all the back to school activities. Band-aid four: graduation. Band-aid five: back to work.
Now, my medicine cabinet is empty, the band-aids are gone, and I didn't use triple antibiotic ointment, so the wound is not yet healed.
So a band-aid covers, hurts when removed, and doesn't heal. I must ask then, what is the point of them, and why am I stuck on them?

No one likes a quitter...but he WOULD have....

So I get told on a regular basis that no one likes a quitter; but I am a quitter. Therefore, I guess what they say is true, because the one person that it would have mattered to is GONE. He hated it SO much, that he was the first person that I wanted to tell when I finally kicked the habit. Unfortunately, he doesn't care anymore. He probably wishes I would have kept the habit, so I would live a short life with a slow and painful death.

I didn't just up and quit on day, though I did try that on many occasions. Here is a brief synopsis of how the process went....

It started with an anxiety attack on the way to work one Thursday morning...I had been discussing chiropractics and acupuncture with a chiropractor that I know, so I gave him a call at lunch. I explained that I wanted to try acupuncture to attempt to alleviate some of my stress and anxiety issues. We set up an appointment for the next evening. After an hour long appointment, overall physical, back adjustments, and 3 acupuncture points only for stress, I walked out with a second appointment for the following Monday, and a total believer in the tranquility that acupuncture could bring. 

I didn't even get the smoking cessation points, yet I had NO desire to smoke. And the two that I had after my appointment made me feel ill. This appointment had lowered my anxiety to the point that I didn't need the nicotine to make myself feel like it was lowering my anxiety (when actually it makes it worse). 

This inspired me. I wanted to start living healthier. As I was driving home that evening from hanging out with friends, I got to thinking of all of the toxins that I put into my body, caffeine, high amounts of sugar, nicotine, high levels of sodium, etc.

At the appointment, the chiro and I also discussed the need to increase my daily intake of water. SO, thus was the kick off of my healthier, reduced stress, reduced anxiety, lifestyle. I no longer smoke, I no longer ingest soda, I try to watch the amount of sugar that is in these "water" drinks, and therefore stick mostly to water, plain and simple. Fast food- out of the question. Fried food- totally reduced. 

I should probably stress that I am not dieting, because I am not doing any of this in an attempt to lose weight. I am doing this in an attempt to be healthier and FEEL better.  I have more energy, I am sleeping better, I get up easier in the mornings, I don't have the mood swings I was having. 

I attribute this to a few things: 

1) Acupunture

2) Detoxifying my body through chiropractics

3) Reducing the amount of toxins I intentionally put into my body.

So back to the beginning of the post, I wish he could see the changes that I have made in my life, and the different person I have become due to the changes. 

Candy Coated

So, I have three blogs, that I pretty much know what they are going to say, yet I sit in front of the computer unable to put the complete thoughts down onto paper. I am not sure what my issue is today, and yesterday for that matter. Well, that is a lie, I kinda do, but if I say them, or type them, then that makes them real. I am not sure that I am ready for those thoughts to be real yet.
My heart hurts when I think about the process of blogging what should be happy (?) occasions for me. My heart hurts because the one person I want to share all of that with is not here for me to share them with.
Acupuncture healed my anxiety...minus the anxiety, all that is left is pain.
I feel like I am back on day five, and just want to crawl in bed, curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep.
My candy coated shell is quickly dissolving.